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Monday 8 November 2010

10 Dating

  
1. Prepare yourself mentally for the dating game. If you really want to succeed ona a particular date, decide what type of person you are looking for, do your research on your own interests and goals, and be ready to commit to dating one individual if need be. Going into a date half cocked just won't work. This doesn't mean the first person you date has to be your future spouse -- but it means you should be ready for a monogamous relationship to arise. Remember that some people do date in order to find Mr. or Miss Right. Also prepare for some let downs along the way -- dating is nothing if not a series of excitements and disappointments, but remember not to take dating too seriously.

   2. Prepare yourself physically for dating. Begin a new health regime if you will -- take a walk every day, get your cardio rate up, start a small diet. Looking your best can just be a matter of showing off that confident glow that comes from joining a gym, eating healthier, or getting a bit more fit. Though preparing yourself this way will not actually find you a date (though you may meet a date at the gym or at the health food store, etc), you will feel a million times more confident about yourself, and confidence is incredibly sexy.
   3. 10 Dating TipsBuy something new for yourself to get you in the right mindset. This may seem shallow, but even a new pair of shoes will give you a boost of confidence that will be simply palpable to your new date. Get your hair cut or styled and begin a new grooming routine. Have a beauty treatment or a massage. This is much like the above piece of advice, but has more to do with specifically treating yourself and raising your spirits. If you get yourself something nice, or treat yourself to a spa day, you can add another boost of confidence to your arsenal. Maybe its time to throw out those tired jeans and buy yourself a new designer pair -- who knows. It isn't the most important facet of a person, but people do appreciate appearance.
   4. Figure out your goals for dating. Ask yourself some questions -- do you see yourself married in the next few years? If you do, then approach your date accordingly. Maybe you are more laid back about dating -- ask yourself some honest questions about why you are dating now, and what you hope to get out of it. If your goal is purely sexual, then ask yourself if you are willing to be honest about this desire with your potential future dates. It will come up at some point on the date -- that dreaded question -- "Where do you see yourself in five years?" Prepare an honest and realistic answer.
   5. I can't stress this enough -- make yourself confident. Unlike the above confidence boosters, here I mean literally boost your confidence right before a date is about to happen. This may mean giving yourself a pep talk in the mirror, or just attending a few social functions in the days before your date. By following the first five tips you will feel better and be more focused, but by giving yourself a bit of a confidence boost before you walk out the door, you'll appear fresh and happy.
   6. When looking for a date, choose a realistic person. Go after a person you have a good chance of dating success with -- this doesn't mean you should aim low, but do aim realistically. Your dating life is based on the entire package you present, not just your personality. If you are looking for a glamourous supermodel, and want to date someone trendy and gorgeous -- good for you, but be prepared and be realistic about your chances. If you're a 6, don't be surprised when a woman who is a 10 rejects you.
   7. Scout out potential dates. Work out in advance where in your town you are most likely to meet people. You can start by joining clubs, social events, sports groups, book clubs, drama clubs, anything where you are likely to meet potential partners. Match the club to the kind of partners you are looking for. Remember that you'll never meet anyone just sitting on your couch.
   8. Enjoy yourself. Dating isn't always a pursuit of a marriage -- it means meeting people and socializing with them and spending time in the company of new people. There is something to learn from everyone, and while you may not be out there looking for new friends, you may be surprised to find just that -- a new friend rather than a new love.
   9. Don't forget to keep an air of mystery about yourself. People like mystery and the thrill of the chase during dating. This means do not give away too much information about yourself on your first few dates, and do not sleep with your dates early on if you want the relationship to progress. If you can stand it, keep the first sexual encounter teetering on the brink. The longer a date is left to chase and fall for you, the more likely they are to be really into you. You can take this too far -- if you 'snub' a potential date too much, they will have no choice but to forget about you and begin to move on. There's a thin line between mystery and outright ignoring a date.
  10. Remember to take a break from dating if you need to. Take time off from dating occasionally, especially if its not going well or if your dates are causing "dating fatigue". Dating is a process, and there is nothing wrong with "recharging the batteries" so to speak -- this will reload that all important confidence and optimism level. The best way to casually date is to do so in phases.

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